Saying Yes To What Is / Carolyn Hobbs

Saying yes dissolves resistance.  It empowers us.  Saying yes helps us stand on both feet and find the courage to handle whatever arrives on our plate today.

Saying yes teaches us that we are safe to be totally honest–with ourselves and our loved ones.  “Yes, I am feeling depressed today, and yes, it is scary to feel this way.”  When we say yes to what is, love and acceptance share the same space with whatever we are feeling.  It says, “I love myself for feeling sad, and for hating feeling sad, right now.”

Yes reassures our tender, vulnerable Inner Self that “I can handle even this.”  It engages our curiosity rather than our habitual resistance.  

As we keep saying yes to what is, we begin to trust life.  We trust that we are having exactly the experience we are supposed to be having.  It may not be the one we expected.  It may trigger varying degrees of fear and discomfort.  But, we say yes anyway.  Soon, each issue, each feeling facing us feels more workable, more manageable.

Resisting feelings forces us to act them out.  Nobody walks around saying, “I’m going to resist life now.”  We don’t start the day declaring, “I think I’ll rob myself of happiness today.”  That’s the problem.  We don’t think about it at all.  It’s an “unconscious” habit.  It occurs below our awareness.  We learned to bypass “negative” feelings, and we just keep doing it.

We think we can avoid conflict in our relationships by withholding feelings that might trigger anger or hurt.  We believe we are protecting ourselves from future disappointment and pain by making “practical, reasonable” choices.  But all we are really doing is acting out our feelings unconsciously.

When we say yes to what is, we see clearly, with loving eyes, our own personalized version of resistance.  The simple act of saying yes to what is helps us make friends with ourselves and life.  It is one of the best gifts we can give ourselves.

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About Carolyn Hobbs

As a therapist, writer, teacher, and workshop leader, Carolyn Hobbs has spent over twenty years teaching clients, couples, and students the path to consciousness and joy.
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